Caution: This may hurt some peoples feelings but that's why it's an option to read, nobody is making you :-)
Priority: A thing that is regarded as more important than another
We all have priorities in every stage of life...
Weather it's from doing our math homework before we get to go play with our friends outside.
Whether it's not calling out of work so you can go to the that really cool party this weekend.
Whether it's blowing off your friends so you can study for you final exams.
Whether it's meeting your husband for dinner instead of going out to a club with friends.
Whether it's realizing you have a human being in your body and you will do nothing to harm it.
Whether it's spending time with your child teaching them how to talk, walk, and be social, even if you lose your best friend over it.
Whether it's setting up a plan for that child to grow up in the best environment you possibly can provide, without putting your selfish tendencies before them.
The list goes on....
A priority is a sacrifice. What are you going to sacrifice in order to get the task done.
So, now that we are all clear on what a priority is, let's get started!
My BIGGEST problem with men and women now a days is the fact that their children are not their first priority. I see these mothers smoking and drinking while pregnant. I see parents dragging their children through 5 different men or women calling them their new mom or dad. I see mothers losing their children over something that could have been prevented with a little brain power. I see mothers getting abortions because they made one little mistake. Question: If you decided to keep that child, wouldn't you HATE yourself for ever thinking about aborting that kid?? I see mothers acting like they have no care in the world for their child unless they are in public and trying to impress and quite frankly, it absolutely disgusts me.
I am giving my mother a virtual hug right now because, even though through my teenage years I thought she was the worst mother in the world, so unfair, blah blah blah, I quickly came to realize she is the greatest mother anyone could ever ask for. She is someone who really had her priorities straight through a tough situation. She had plenty of chances to do all those bad things, smoke while pregnant, hang out with friends other than her children, had an abortion. But she didn't, she had her head on straight, and her priorities were in order. Children come first.
Love ya momma!
My second biggest problem is the fact that parents aren't willing to work in order to keep their family/self afloat. They think it's easier to cash an unemployment check, collect alimony/child support, marry rich or sell drugs to make money. No. Get off your ass and get a second, third, fourth job if you need to! Because honestly, if you have no money to make your bills and feed your family, do you really have time to go party it up with your friends?
Priorities.
I have sat back and watched these things happen in lives around me, and there is nothing you can do. People are set in their ways and really don't wanna hear how bad they suck at living their life.
Now I'm no saint by any means, but at least I have my priorities straight.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
BAD HEALTHCARE
A little over a year ago I was in a 3 car accident leaving Joe and I with chronic pains all over. Most of the symptoms have subsided except for this nasty back pain I was having. We decide to go to the doctor, Dr. Adams, and see what he recommends. He throws many pain killers our way and refers us to the chiropractor that practices in the same building. Joe and I are excited because we've never been to a chiropractor and have heard it feels so good! We walk on over, have our initial exam which is a whopping 5 minutes long and go off to get our back and neck cracked and...wow, it did feel pretty good. But what really got exciting was the 15 minute massage afterwards...Woo Hoo!
Yeah, this quickly wore off about 2 months in...
We weren't getting any better, in fact, we were getting worse! What kind of doctor makes you feel worse?! The medication was too strong you can't function when you take them! I ask Dr. Adams what he can give me that will null the pain but not make me as drowsy. Simple question right? He proceeds to laugh in my face and tell me that I "must be crazy to believe there is such a drug like that." And walked away....
I was in shock. And a little pissed.
I roll it off my shoulder and we tell the chiropractor that we're getting worse and what does he do? Lower our visits...
He does, however, order MRI's which proceed to tell us we have a few bulged discs in our back and that is no big deal and we can "knock them right back into place!" And sent us on our way...
WHAT THE?!?!?!?!?!
Yeah, made no sense to me either.
We are going to the doctor under a motor vehicle accident and figure we cannot switch doctors easily through it. So, we put up with this crap until May of 2011...almost a year later and still worse than ever.
Around June, we find an orthopedic surgeon to look at our backs. He was really shocked that we waited this long to see him with my back in its condition.
Understandable.
Turns out I have 2 herniated discs in my back. Not bulged.
He recommends me getting surgery on my back, no alternative methods, nothing. Just surgery.
So I decide to get a second opinion.
UUUGGGHHH!!!!!
So, my lawyer refers me to another physiatrist that she has solely been worked on by and highly recommends. Yay! Finally! But apparently he's a very busy man because he cannot see me til freakin November...
*&^$@*&^$@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you seeing my frustration?!?!?
Let's just start all over because these doctors are just not working for us anymore. I do my research online and I find West Side Medical Center. I hear great reviews so I decide to give a whirl. I called and they were SUPER friendly on the phone, and thats my biggest pet peeve.- when people are mean on the phone. And I got an appointment within a few days! I'm so excited.
So, this morning was our appointment at 8:45. I was expecting a half an hour with the doctor... 45 minutes at the most. Do you know what time I left there? 11:00!! Are you kidding me? This lady actually took her time to figure out what was wrong with me. She ordered all kinds of labwork, referred me to a doctor for my back, finding out why I haven't had a freakin baby yet. I mean, I'm so impressed with this doctor and the entire center and I can't wait to see her again on Friday...
I think I'm in love with my doctor :-)
But I just wonder why the healthcare system has gone so downhill. It is so hard to find a doctor that cares. When you go to the ER everyone walks around like they absolutely hate their job. If you are that miserable with your job, please, quit and give it to someone who is laid off who will appreciate the job!
:-)
Have a great day!
Yeah, this quickly wore off about 2 months in...
We weren't getting any better, in fact, we were getting worse! What kind of doctor makes you feel worse?! The medication was too strong you can't function when you take them! I ask Dr. Adams what he can give me that will null the pain but not make me as drowsy. Simple question right? He proceeds to laugh in my face and tell me that I "must be crazy to believe there is such a drug like that." And walked away....
I was in shock. And a little pissed.
I roll it off my shoulder and we tell the chiropractor that we're getting worse and what does he do? Lower our visits...
He does, however, order MRI's which proceed to tell us we have a few bulged discs in our back and that is no big deal and we can "knock them right back into place!" And sent us on our way...
WHAT THE?!?!?!?!?!
Yeah, made no sense to me either.
We are going to the doctor under a motor vehicle accident and figure we cannot switch doctors easily through it. So, we put up with this crap until May of 2011...almost a year later and still worse than ever.
Around June, we find an orthopedic surgeon to look at our backs. He was really shocked that we waited this long to see him with my back in its condition.
Understandable.
Turns out I have 2 herniated discs in my back. Not bulged.
He recommends me getting surgery on my back, no alternative methods, nothing. Just surgery.
So I decide to get a second opinion.
UUUGGGHHH!!!!!
So, my lawyer refers me to another physiatrist that she has solely been worked on by and highly recommends. Yay! Finally! But apparently he's a very busy man because he cannot see me til freakin November...
*&^$@*&^$@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you seeing my frustration?!?!?
Let's just start all over because these doctors are just not working for us anymore. I do my research online and I find West Side Medical Center. I hear great reviews so I decide to give a whirl. I called and they were SUPER friendly on the phone, and thats my biggest pet peeve.- when people are mean on the phone. And I got an appointment within a few days! I'm so excited.
So, this morning was our appointment at 8:45. I was expecting a half an hour with the doctor... 45 minutes at the most. Do you know what time I left there? 11:00!! Are you kidding me? This lady actually took her time to figure out what was wrong with me. She ordered all kinds of labwork, referred me to a doctor for my back, finding out why I haven't had a freakin baby yet. I mean, I'm so impressed with this doctor and the entire center and I can't wait to see her again on Friday...
I think I'm in love with my doctor :-)
But I just wonder why the healthcare system has gone so downhill. It is so hard to find a doctor that cares. When you go to the ER everyone walks around like they absolutely hate their job. If you are that miserable with your job, please, quit and give it to someone who is laid off who will appreciate the job!
:-)
Have a great day!
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Who knew babies could break your heart?
This medication, medroxyprogesterone...say what?!?
Well what the doctor so nicely forgot to mention was how sick it would make me...
Yuck, and I have to take this for 7 days?!?
What a long week this is going to be...
Lets rewind a little bit...
Fathers day of 2010:
Sitting around the dinner table just the two of us enjoying a meal of chicken sandwiches and I'm complaining that I just don't feel that lovely... I was achey and tired and just all in all not in a great mood. He looks at me and asks... "babe, are you pregnant?" I couldn't have laughed in his face any harder! Me?? Pregnant?? We've only been dating for 7 months! Theres no way... He decides to run to the drugstore and pick up a test, he returned and I couldn't wait to take that test and prove to him I wasn't pregnant!
3 minutes later.
Pregnant...
Are you kidding me?
I'm 20 years old, not married, with this man for 7 months, and I'm pregnant? I thought this would never happen to me. I thought I'd have a career going, a husband, a house, let alone a room to put this baby in. Can I raise a baby? Yeah I worked in a childrens nursery for 5 years, it's not the same! I would just call someones parents if the child got out of hand. I'm having a baby.... I'm having a baby! And the most wonderful man is going to be the father!! I haven't told him yet, i gotta get out of this bathroom and tell him.
"Babe?" while holding the test
"No way.."
"I'm pregnant!"
The amount of love that came out of his eyes. The amount of joy that was in this room at this moment when we jumped into eachothers arms. We kissed and hugged and cried because we're having a baby! We couldn't have been more excited. We get on the phone with everybody we knew. People we haven't talked to in years we called and told. We wanted to shout it from our itty bitty apartment rooftop. We laid in bed that night thinking of names, and we came up with Colyn if it's a boy and Clarissa if it's a girl. I can't believe we're having a baby...
The next morning, I set up a doctors appointment to figure out what the hell do I do now? They give me my prenatal vitamins, we discuss a healthy diet, and in 6 weeks they will do the first ultra sound. I am so excited! I get to see this being in my body, I actually get to see him or her!
*Sigh* I can't wait
A week or so later on July 4th...
"Babe, I'm starting to bleed..."
I call a few parents to see what they recommend and I'm told if it gets worse, go to the ER.
It got worse...
7:00pm We arrive at the ER. Tell them whats happening and we wait.... and wait, and wait...
1:00am "Denise?" Yes! Finally someone to see me! I follow the nurse into this little room and she gives me a gown to put on and lay on the bed. And I wait...
3:00am "Denise? Time for an ultra sound" I'm excited. I'm scared. I'm wheeled down the hallway to this freezing cold room. I have to pee like the dickens but I'm not allowed to! The Ultrasound Technician asks "how far along are you?" I tell her i'm not sure but somewhere within 6-8 weeks. She looks back at the monitor. "See this right here? This could be something but I doubt it is... according to what I see you are not pregnant."
I could have killed her...
She was the meanest women I've ever met. No remorse. It's like she hated her job that much and couldn't wait for her shift to be over, and shoved me out of the room like I was nothing. I'm taken back to my room and we wait for the doctor to discharge us.
7:45am "Alright, Denise and Joe, we can't say for sure you've miscarried but it doesn't look like the baby is still there, tomorrow go take some more tests and we will know for sure."
*sigh* I don't know if I was more mad for waiting over 12 hours for a job that could've been done in 1, or if I was just so overly exhausted I didn't care about anything.
Long story short, I miscarried.
I cried for days on end, I couldn't do anything... I could barely get out of bed. I never thought in a million years that I would lose a baby. It didn't make sense. I thought miscarriages happened because the mother was neglecting their duties as a mother? I thought in order to miscarry you need to do something to harm that baby. Smoking, drinking, drugs? I didn't do anything. Why on earth did I miscarry? I ate my veggies, I took my vitamins like clockwork. What did we do wrong?!
We want to try again. We live out lives day to day, we do our same routine, I enroll in school and begin my path to a career.
November 15th, 2010.
I'm pregnant!!
I'm stressed, I'm scared, I'm excited, I'm nervous.
Do I tell people this time?
We told our parents so we'd have some support system.
I call my doctor and and she sends me for blood tests right away. They came back low on a few hormones and she told me that can be normal we'll take a few more just to be sure. A week later, on the day before thanksgiving, I start to bleed.
Oh my goodness not again... I can't do this again. We cannot take another devastation like this.
November 25th, 2010 Thankgiving Day.
We put on smiles and eat lots of a food. This is a day for family and being close to everyone and nothing is going to bring us down, but damn it I had to pee!
What I saw changed my life...
The remanence...
I can't...
We left thanksgiving early, went home, and I cried...
The doctors were all on vacation, I couldn't get a hold of anyone, I'm not sitting in an ER for 13 hours.
Monday morning I went for lab work and it confirmed our greatest fear...
Another miscarriage.
We cried for days... I didn't do anything wrong? And this time we were careful! I took my vitamins, and ate my veggies...
We're told there is nothing they can do until a year of trying and/or 3 miscarriages.
What a rough couple of months...
"Babe, lets do things right..."
We get engaged, get married, accept god into our lives and just live our lives.
1 year later, still no pregnancy, no end in sight really.
And that's why babies are breaking our heart...
Fast forward back to reality!
After a year of trying to concieve with no success, we call our doctor with concern and back to that yucky medicine. They will do some hormone testing to see what I'm low on and we'll go from there, right?
Well what the doctor so nicely forgot to mention was how sick it would make me...
Yuck, and I have to take this for 7 days?!?
What a long week this is going to be...
Lets rewind a little bit...
Fathers day of 2010:
Sitting around the dinner table just the two of us enjoying a meal of chicken sandwiches and I'm complaining that I just don't feel that lovely... I was achey and tired and just all in all not in a great mood. He looks at me and asks... "babe, are you pregnant?" I couldn't have laughed in his face any harder! Me?? Pregnant?? We've only been dating for 7 months! Theres no way... He decides to run to the drugstore and pick up a test, he returned and I couldn't wait to take that test and prove to him I wasn't pregnant!
3 minutes later.
Pregnant...
Are you kidding me?
I'm 20 years old, not married, with this man for 7 months, and I'm pregnant? I thought this would never happen to me. I thought I'd have a career going, a husband, a house, let alone a room to put this baby in. Can I raise a baby? Yeah I worked in a childrens nursery for 5 years, it's not the same! I would just call someones parents if the child got out of hand. I'm having a baby.... I'm having a baby! And the most wonderful man is going to be the father!! I haven't told him yet, i gotta get out of this bathroom and tell him.
"Babe?" while holding the test
"No way.."
"I'm pregnant!"
The amount of love that came out of his eyes. The amount of joy that was in this room at this moment when we jumped into eachothers arms. We kissed and hugged and cried because we're having a baby! We couldn't have been more excited. We get on the phone with everybody we knew. People we haven't talked to in years we called and told. We wanted to shout it from our itty bitty apartment rooftop. We laid in bed that night thinking of names, and we came up with Colyn if it's a boy and Clarissa if it's a girl. I can't believe we're having a baby...
The next morning, I set up a doctors appointment to figure out what the hell do I do now? They give me my prenatal vitamins, we discuss a healthy diet, and in 6 weeks they will do the first ultra sound. I am so excited! I get to see this being in my body, I actually get to see him or her!
*Sigh* I can't wait
A week or so later on July 4th...
"Babe, I'm starting to bleed..."
I call a few parents to see what they recommend and I'm told if it gets worse, go to the ER.
It got worse...
7:00pm We arrive at the ER. Tell them whats happening and we wait.... and wait, and wait...
1:00am "Denise?" Yes! Finally someone to see me! I follow the nurse into this little room and she gives me a gown to put on and lay on the bed. And I wait...
3:00am "Denise? Time for an ultra sound" I'm excited. I'm scared. I'm wheeled down the hallway to this freezing cold room. I have to pee like the dickens but I'm not allowed to! The Ultrasound Technician asks "how far along are you?" I tell her i'm not sure but somewhere within 6-8 weeks. She looks back at the monitor. "See this right here? This could be something but I doubt it is... according to what I see you are not pregnant."
I could have killed her...
She was the meanest women I've ever met. No remorse. It's like she hated her job that much and couldn't wait for her shift to be over, and shoved me out of the room like I was nothing. I'm taken back to my room and we wait for the doctor to discharge us.
7:45am "Alright, Denise and Joe, we can't say for sure you've miscarried but it doesn't look like the baby is still there, tomorrow go take some more tests and we will know for sure."
*sigh* I don't know if I was more mad for waiting over 12 hours for a job that could've been done in 1, or if I was just so overly exhausted I didn't care about anything.
Long story short, I miscarried.
I cried for days on end, I couldn't do anything... I could barely get out of bed. I never thought in a million years that I would lose a baby. It didn't make sense. I thought miscarriages happened because the mother was neglecting their duties as a mother? I thought in order to miscarry you need to do something to harm that baby. Smoking, drinking, drugs? I didn't do anything. Why on earth did I miscarry? I ate my veggies, I took my vitamins like clockwork. What did we do wrong?!
We want to try again. We live out lives day to day, we do our same routine, I enroll in school and begin my path to a career.
November 15th, 2010.
I'm pregnant!!
I'm stressed, I'm scared, I'm excited, I'm nervous.
Do I tell people this time?
We told our parents so we'd have some support system.
I call my doctor and and she sends me for blood tests right away. They came back low on a few hormones and she told me that can be normal we'll take a few more just to be sure. A week later, on the day before thanksgiving, I start to bleed.
Oh my goodness not again... I can't do this again. We cannot take another devastation like this.
November 25th, 2010 Thankgiving Day.
We put on smiles and eat lots of a food. This is a day for family and being close to everyone and nothing is going to bring us down, but damn it I had to pee!
What I saw changed my life...
The remanence...
I can't...
We left thanksgiving early, went home, and I cried...
The doctors were all on vacation, I couldn't get a hold of anyone, I'm not sitting in an ER for 13 hours.
Monday morning I went for lab work and it confirmed our greatest fear...
Another miscarriage.
We cried for days... I didn't do anything wrong? And this time we were careful! I took my vitamins, and ate my veggies...
We're told there is nothing they can do until a year of trying and/or 3 miscarriages.
What a rough couple of months...
"Babe, lets do things right..."
We get engaged, get married, accept god into our lives and just live our lives.
1 year later, still no pregnancy, no end in sight really.
And that's why babies are breaking our heart...
Fast forward back to reality!
After a year of trying to concieve with no success, we call our doctor with concern and back to that yucky medicine. They will do some hormone testing to see what I'm low on and we'll go from there, right?
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